Friday, December 17, 2010

Song of the Week (Simon & Garfunkel - Scarborough Fair)

"Are you going to Scarborough Fair?" Seriously, cuz I need a ride, and my broadsword won't fit in my Mini-Cooper.

I walked into the office yesterday in this crisp winter air, and the security guard at my building (we'll call him Bob) was walking into the office at the same time. Here is the exchange:
JZ: Hey Bob, how's it going?
Bob: Pretty good. (Bob doesn't know my name)
JZ: Big weekend plans this weekend?
Bob: Well I MAY be going out to dinner this Friday."
JZ: Oh yeah? Where to?
Bob: Well, me and my family are TRYING to go to Medieval Times (dinner and tournament), but you know how Medieval Times is around the holidays...tough to get in.
JZ: I hear that. You know Medieval Times is a lot of fun if the whole group is into it.
Bob: Oh yeah! Well I am definitely into it. I go to Scarborough Fair every year!
JZ: Really?
Bob: Oh yeah, I get all dressed up and everything. Bob starts singing "Scarborough Fair" and then makes some battle axe motions with his mitten-covered paws. Clearly there is a story behind Bob a LARP'er (Live Action Role Play'er)?
JZ: Bob, do you LARP?
Bob: Do you?
JZ: I've dabbled...(I haven't really dabbled, but I had to learn more...seriously! I haven't! I watched this movie one time...whatever.) (Bob bring his hand across his chest and salutes me)
Bob: I'm a level 6 Dwarf Warrior (satisfied look on his face)
JZ: DUDE...that is badass!
Bob: I know.
JZ: Well, good luck at Medieval Times and watch out for Angry Dragons.
Bob: Oh I will!

This happened.

Which brings me to a question: Are Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel players of World of Warcraft? I would wager that they are. If so, have they ever teamed up with LeRoy Jenkins?

In all seriousness Simon and Garfunkel are 2 masters of chillwave. FYI Folk music is the original chillwave. I would go as far as to say, without S&G we wouldn't have the likes of Air or M83 which would just be a damn shame. This song reminds me of Christmas...and LARPing. Best listened to curled up in a large chair by the fireplace with a novel authored by Cormac McCarthy or Angela Steele.

Hope you Dig,

Friday, December 10, 2010

Song of the Week (Dirty Money - Coming Home)

In keeping with the recent Hip-hop-sploration, I decided to take on "Commercial Rap". I forgot there was such a thing, until I was at dinner with some girl from Atlanta. I asked her what kind of music she liked. She replied: "Any sort of commercial rap, you know like Trey Songz, Akon, Drake, Rhianna, etc." She might as well have punched me in the mouth. The only thing worse than "commercial rap" is "commercial country," "acid showers," "battles with Sam the cat" and "the creepy guy who works at Starbucks in Oak Lawn".

Did anyone else see Diddy on SNL last week (not live, of course)? I mean, how much did that suck? The whole time I kept thinking, if the ghost of Biggie Smalls was in the audience, he probably just died again...for realz. I felt like I was watching the Black-Eyed Peas making out with Kanye (ex-Fergie).

In this song, Diddy/Dirty Money/Puffy/Sean (P.Diddy) Combs/D.Piddy, makes a series of proclamations and asks some puzzling questions. I would like to comment on a few:

1) "If you ever been lost in life before, this one is for you"
JZ: If you like things that are difficult to listen to, this one is for you.

2) "What if my twins ask me why I ain't marryin' Momz...Damn, how do I respond?"
JZ: Kids, I think you need to know the truth: P. Diddy like dudes.

3) "If you at home on your couch right now, wave your hands in the air!"
JZ: Seriously Dirty Money? Wave my hands in the air on my couch? Seriously Puff? If I ever go on SNL, I'm gonna say something like: "If you at home on your couch right now, I want you to write a check payable to JZ for $1,000, and then send it to this P.O. Box..."

P.S. I seriously wasn't drinking Hater-ade this week. See you at the klub.

Hope you Dig,

Friday, December 3, 2010

Song of the Week (Bun B ft. Slim Thugga and Play-N-Skillz - Ridin' Slow)

Bun B's "Ridin' Slow" came highly recommended from a certain friend with the alias Ben Bunny...coincidence? Maybe.

Immediately comparisons were drawn to Lil' Troy's anthem "Wanna be a Balla, shot calla". I'll admit there are some similarities.

I'll admit, I'm not the biggest "Rap" fan, and I would firmly classify "Ridin' Slow" as Rap, but this song offers something more than the typical "Dance undawatah and not get wet" fare.

1) Bun B reps Texas
2) Produced by Play-N-Skillz. Oh you don't know Play-N-Skillz? Thas a CHOP!
3) Filmed in D-town...SUN
4) I'm a dirty South representer, summertime, spring to the fall to the winter
O.G. in the game, no beginner
Don't take a loss (loss), get with a winner
Lobsters on my plate for dinner (dinner)
And your bitch is the midnight snack (snack)

I love how rappers let you know how good they're living. Next time my boss asks me how my weekend was, I'm gonna be all like: Well, basically I left work and

Snagged more Eatzie's than I could eata,
so I saved the rest up in my freeza.
Went to Cap pub spittin' game at ladies
Then Street Fighter 2 at Barcay-deez

You know, generally, just ridin' slow...

Hope you Dig,